Tuesday, 11 March 2014

Shut Up! Be a dad.

I have an amazing father. I cannot gush enough about how amazing my dad is.

Which is why I found it strange at a point in my life when I noticed that a lot of men were terrible fathers.

I have seen men struggle with how to be men, husbands and dads and the only conclusion I could reach was there was no father to teach them, there was no one to show this boys-now-turned-men how to relate and behave as men when they grew older!

Some argue that it is not an African thing to show emotions or show love. But guess the price for non-involvement is much more steep than the pride you want to hold on to for non-involvement.

Many dads nowadays,  love dressing up kids in lovely clothes, strike selfie poses, go to work and spend an incredible amount of time making money.

Some make all the money and give the kids the best in life, but there is no one to teach the kids about values, the honour in keeping their promises/words.

Kids are not taught how to be responsible for their siblings, how to be selfless, how to be a provider, how to be responsible around the house.

The general assumption is that male kids will have this ''sudden awakening'' at some stage and begin to do all that is expected of them.

Eeeeeeerrrr Nope! That is not going to happen!

If you are maladjusted, you can rectify your issues by reading books, spending QUALITY time with the kids. It would give insight to the kind of parenting they need!

But if you think you have no issues and men before you didn't deal with the crap, then perhaps you should know this...

Quit spending hours at the Drinking bars while assuming that your wife is looking after the kids.
Quit spending all of your time in church while steering clear from involvement in your kid's life
Quit hiding behind work so no one will notice that you cannot bear to be alone with your kids for ten minutes straight.
Quit transferring the lazy mental attitude by sitting in front of the TV all the time

In other words, quit giving excuses!

Shut up! Be a dad

Love always
ilsa aida

1 comment:

  1. I absolutely loved this piece. It brought back memories of my Dad. It is now 1,095 days since he departed this earth, for eternity. And I still thank God for his life, the lessons he taught me, the love he showed me and the values he shared with me.

    The best gift any man can give to his daughter, is to be her friend and hero. May God bless you awesomely Dad, for being so wonderful to me.

    ~Ayi Moses