Friday, 17 January 2014

At 6am

Flash full lights, avoid known pot-holes, zig-zag across slow moving vehicles, blast the jamming music to keep you awake, put on your foundation & nude lipstick for the day, do the car dance when the music hits the crescendo...all from 6am. All that before I reach Ajah bus stop.

All done,  I am a bit calm, I am able to observe my surroundings. I observe and I  ***gasp***
  • The dude in the Hyundai Elantra reading a booklet with his inner light while driving at 80kph
  • The fine boy who hits the fine girls' vehicle, and they step out speaking oyinbo. Wish I could wait to see the drama
  • the woman doing the full beauty make-up line on her bleached face. Whaaat Whoooot!
  • The boy and girl yelling on top of their lungs at each other. oh oh! Night gone awry!
  • The woman in the Prado Jeep dozing in traffic
  •  The dude doing the car version of the harlem shake
  • The woman eating a bowl of Indomie without a care in the world
  • The woman who rolled down her window to lay the red lipstick using the side mirror
  •  
  • The man and woman who keep staring at each other with loving looks for over an hour. Yuck.
          Yes I trailed them. lol
 
At 6am, the roads are an amazing sight!. So much to see, so much to laugh at, so much to learn especially the art of multi-tasking, so much to smile at.
 
All from 6am and beyond.
 
Mwuah. Have a beautiful weekend!

Thursday, 16 January 2014

Let us give a standing ovation to...the player of the year. Episode 3

He is Kevwe...
 
Marilyn said...
 
I met him at the airport. I was on my way to school in Benin, Edo State. I had noticed him with his lean body and amahzing look on the queue. Gosh! He was handsome!
 
I quickly looked away. I had a boyfriend, who was serious about a future with me. And I took relationships seriously.
 
It turned out we were both on the same flight and the only reason I knew this was because I brushed past him on the way to my seat.
 
I apologized and got moving. I was in the final year of university and I did not have time for distractions. No lean, dressing nicely kind of man, handsome man would distract me. No time!
 
I got off the plane and headed towards the cab lot to hail a vehicle to my private university. It was getting late and I still had one hour travel time before I got back to school.
 
I got into the cab and we drove off.
 
I was nudged awake by the driver when I got to the hostels and I guess wanting to make me his permanent customer, he asked for my telephone number. I obliged without any drama.
 
School started. A week went by and life was in the go-mood.
 
Then I got back from class one day and met a bouquet of flowers. It was simply signed 'K'.
 
K? Who was K? My boyfriends' name was Shola.
 
Long story, I got a phone call from K who in fact turned out to be Kevwe..
 
I was shocked how the dude got my phone number but he told me a long story that almost amounted to stalking. His voice, the chase , his manners intrigued me. I needed to know more. Who was this guy?
 
Little gifts came, so did a lot of messages. He spoke to the way my mind operated. Intelligent but funny. I kept them from Shola, I was intrigued. All the attention was too much to pass up.
 
It got worse. Each day, I could not wait till the following day to see what K had planned.
 
Soon the semester was ended and it was time to go home. I flew to Lagos and into the arms of the man who somehow had invaded my every thought.
 
We watched movies and had dinners at the most beautiful restaurants. Kevwe had class. It did not take long before I gently broke it off with Shola. I was in love with Kevwe.
 
He called me his 'baby mama' He showed me what a princess I was. What was there not to love.
 
I was drunk in love. I introduced him to my siblings who grilled in for hours and fell in love with him afterwards.
 
He was a dream.
 
About 8 months after I had graduated and was doing the compulsory National Youth Service Corp, Kevwe invited me to go to Paris with him on holiday.
 
It was magical. It was beautiful.
 
And there in a café by the famed towers, he got down on his knees and asked me to marry him.
 
I looked at him with all the love in my eyes and told him NO!
 
You see, I had never been to Kevwe's house, we always met in hotels. He always locked his phone. I had not met any member of his family. He never picked up phone calls in my presence. He shouted at people who irritated him, choosing to call them bastard!
 
That day, the day he asked me to marry him,  I separated my head from my heart. Kevwe was bad news. He was textbook sample of all I had been told of players.
 
I walked away. Today, I am glad I made the best decision because two months later, I heard he was married.
 
*********************
You can click and read the remaining series
 
Episode 1:
 
Episode 2:

Monday, 13 January 2014

United by pain

She stood on the balcony staring at  the way the sunrise coloured the ocean. She was on her honeymoon with her husband. Her husband of 2weeks, a man she had known for the last 4years.

She felt delirious joy as she looked at KK sleeping.

Her feelings surprised her, she did not realise she had the capacity to to love someone with every part of her body

As she stood smiling, thoughts sipped into her consciousness. Her frown lines sipped from the pores of her skin as she remembered... it had not always been that way.

She met KK four years ago when she was battling through an ugly divorce from her first husband. Chima, was not a terrible person, he just was not the one for her. The zig-zag, unbalanced relationship they had, caused him to beat her, womanize, oppress her. At that time, it became clear to her that they were drowning in a maze of sorrow. The marriage that had started on friendly terms was now a war zone. Each side with its own military arsenal and defence.

At the about that time KK too was having issues with his wife, he said the woman regularly disrespected him, she had adulterous relationships with men at work, she fell out of love with KK.

Ojuolape smiled as she thought about how she and KK met, it was strangely through a mutual friend. They exchanged numbers, chatted now and then, discussing the pain they went through. They didn't know when or how it happened but suddenly they couldn't go through a day successfully without speaking. They had grown on each other.

Soon she and KK were faced with a situation; They genuinely liked each other. But KK was married.
 
She realised that she couldn't continue to proceed with the emotional affair, KK was still married and there was the possibility he and his first wife could work out their issues, She had to cut all communication. She had to let 'them' go.

She remembered that even at that time, she struggled with her Christian faith, she wanted KK for herself but how she felt for another woman's husband was not right. She and KK, they couldn't be found doing the same things they accused their spouses of doing.
 
They both let it go but it hurt, it hurt so bad.
 
She was miserable at work. She snapped at everybody. She wanted KK bad. She wanted him at her side, to look into his eyes, laugh, cry etc.
 
He told her he became calm, he took all his pain to God and got some sort of perseverance. He went back to his marriage, tried to fix it, took out time to love his wife and son. Gave it everything he had.

She let it go, faced her life. KK too. They stopped communicating
 
She started smiling ear to ear when she recollected how they met again. She boarded the plane that was taking her to Nigeria, New York had been so much fun.
 
As she made her way to her seat, she bumped into a passenger by her seat. It was KK. Fates and the airline had seated her with KK.
 
The ocean of emotions ran right back up her heart. He hugged her with all the life he could muster.
 
Legs wobbling, they sat down. Looked at each other with tears running down their faces.
 
He said he and his wife worked at the marriage, they tried but six months ago she went to be with the Lord. She had Cancer.
 
When they arrived Nigeria, he did not let go of her hand, he took her straight to his mum.
 
And they say the rest is history...
 
KK got up and walked to her and held her in an embrace meant only for her. And as she snuggled into the arms of the man who had now become her husband.
 
She realised Pain had brought them together. Pain had united them

Thursday, 9 January 2014

Dear God

Dear God,
 
He is hurting. He is in pain. He has tried all that he knows, he has loved in everyway he knows to. Now he is empty, lonely and afraid.
 
He speaks a lot about his dreams, his vision, his plans but he speaks from Faith. He is not sure that he can deal with the emotional pain he is feeling.
 
He is not known to cry, yet he cries now and then. He cries for a lost love, he cries for a love he cannot have.
 
Many know him, many speak highly of him, many wish he was theirs.
 
He is amused by all the attention, sometimes he feeds off it too but at night when he lays his head to rest, ALL he wants is to be comforted by the love he once knew.
 
Lord, he has been strong all his life, he has hustled his way to some recognition but now there is an ache, an emptiness, a void that only you can fill.
 
For the few hours he spends at work, he turns his head and heart to robots. No feelings! No thinking! Just Work!
 
There is nothing he will not give for a second chance to do it better. There is nothing he will not give for a chance to turn back the hand of time.
 
He is afraid to pray, afraid to come before you. He thinks you will judge him for all the wrong he has done. He forgets that you are a loving God.
 
This man, your son needs you. You are the only one who can give him the calm he needs in his heart.
 
Do not forsake him dear Lord, do not leave him to himself. He needs you so much. He is nothing without you.
 
Exchange his pride for humility, make him what he was born to be, let him accomplish all he sets his heart to according to your will.
 
I know you hear me, I know you will never forsake me.

Thank you dear God

ff: the woman praying for the men in their lives.

Wednesday, 8 January 2014

I am waiting for you...

I don't talk about you to anyone. I don't let on the fact that I miss you and I am waiting for you.
 
Your name 'Aida-Zoe is the password for some official documents. I can't wait for you to get here.
 
The love I know I will have for you is going to be so powerful, I have already imagined how attentive I will be to ALL your needs.
 
I have made plans for all the cities of the world I want to show you, I have made plans for all the things we will create together.
 
I cannot wait to show you off to everyone and say that is my...
 
I know you are going to be awesome. I know I will be so proud of you when you accomplish all you want to do in life.
 
Truth is, I don't fret or worry about you like everybody else around me. I know you will come!
 
You are smiling at me, I can feel it. I already feel your love even though you are nowhere in sight. But like your name implies, you are noble.
 
You are not Faith talk, you are not my fantasy, you are real. 'Realer' than the air I breathe now even though I cannot feel you.
 
No one will love you like I will. No one will protect you like I will. No one will be firm with you like I will be. No one will tell you the truth more than I will.
 
I promise that I will always give you Truth & Love
 
I will be your rock, I will be your human strength, I will pray for you, I will hold you when you are blue, nothing will touch you through me.
 
Everything I do is for you. All of the sleepless nights, all of what I have endured is for you.
 
I know you will be just too good to be true.
 
I am already blessed with the wealth of knowing you will come. There is NOTHING anyone can say different.
 
My Joy, My love, My heartbeat, My deliciousness, My everything!
 
No matter how long it takes my darling, I will be waiting for you.
 
 
 

Tuesday, 7 January 2014

Let me upgrade you!

So I was going to write on another topic today when I started chatting with an old girlfriend on Facebook. And the stuff she said motivated me to write this post.

I am a believer in the fact that women are powerful, I mean you don't have to sing about who runs the world like BeyoncĂ©,  to realise that women do. (I know I am going to get an earful of comments from the male folk) But I don't care.

The slant eye, the evil stare, the keep your hands to yourself mama, the trashy put your clothes on, the this my space and my territory, all point to the fact that we are full of life and drama.

Fact! Women are territorial, they do not readily welcome another female into the fold until you prove that you are not there to compete.

And men, do we like to compete!
 
 C'mon Ladies. A specie as powerful as the womenfolk cannot afford to fight with each other. What to do is empower each other.

Recognize what your sister is. Help. Empower. Upgrade

We are super human. Imagine all of that strength, all of that multi-tasking abilities, all of that drama, all of that focus geared towards helping one another.

It will definitely be a case of 'We rule the world'
 
I will empower any lady with my strengths. I hope you will do the same for me.
 
Be a shoulder, Listen, Care, help me pose properly for selfies, tell me the truth, be loyal, be firm, pray with me, cry with me, laugh with me, hold my hand through the wilderness
 
No more competition, no more 'you must not do better than me'
 
Just Love...in that way that only women can. And let us build a world that we rule.
(Running to hide before they begin to throw stones)

Gros Bisous

Monday, 6 January 2014

Honour my Curves

Evening Memo to the men,

Just because I do not look like the skinny b*****s you see on the cover of magazines or starve myself to look like a model, does not mean I am less than human.
 
You will NOT ridicule me, You will NOT comment on how busty I am, you will NOT comment on how big my backside is, you will NOT joke around and call me Orobo. What you will do, is honour my curves.
 
I ain't joking.
 
My body is my temple, I may be sizes different from what you are used to but you will worship it and you will honour my curves.
 
I do not want to hear you mutter s**t about it, I do not want to hear you compare me with your sister, mother, wife, girlfriend or concubine, I will have your heart for breakfast. And No!, I am not a witch!
 
I am tired of societal expectations, I am tired of everyone expecting me to look like the next woman, if you want me to look like the next woman, perhaps you should be with the next woman. No jokes. This is the dope truth right here.
 
I will NOT entertain your disrespect for my body and allow your shallow thoughts water down to the younger generation who are confused about how to interpret what all the noise is about extra-curvy women.
 
And FYI, if I see you disrespect any young baby girl, laugh at her or make her cry, then you are going to get the #ilsaaidamemo. I am not playing.
 
Don't get me wrong, we need to exercise to stay healthy, live long and be happy.
 
But in that journey to that point, don't expect me to understand that you have an insane need to disrespect my body because I am 'femally' different.
 
Just Honour my curves and the curves of every baby girl out there and you and I will not have any problems.
 
 
Signed
ff: Every Femally Female around the world.