Friday, 22 March 2013

Who do we blame?

Anabelle grew up in the church, both her parents were Deacons.
She felt stifled with all the rules, how about her? All she wanted was to live life to the fullest. She wanted to wear make-up, trousers, body hugs and have a boyfriend. Every girl had a boyfriend now(but her parents had told her she could only court the man she was to marry? what nonsense) Everywhere she went, people expected her to have the halo of angels on her, did they not know that she was just a girl, a growing swan?
Her parents were the ordained ministers, why would their decision shadow her life?
And even though she had been taught and shown the right path, she wanted to experience life on her own! After all, she was a big girl.
Then she met Victor.
They met at a mutual friend's birthday party. He was shy and about 10 years older, he was a media executive for one of the telecoms story in Nigeria. The way he spoke to her, he made her feel smart and beautiful. He was sweet, he was sensitive, he was so amazing.
His shyness was an aphrodisiac to her. His shyness was perfect for her boisterous attitude.
Only one problem.
He was very married.
But putting her values aside, she began dating, meeting secretly at hotels and rendevous points. He was in love with her. She was in love with him. It was not her fault. It was the wife's fault. What kind of woman would leave this amazing man alone in Nigeria to live in another country. It was the wife's mistake she rationalized despite the fact that her conscience struggled with her over and over again).
They had dated for a year when she became pregnant. She was scared. She did not want to her parents but she certainly was not going to give up a love child with the man of her dreams.
But she managed to tell her parents about the decision she had reached and in the midst of tears, they watched as their daughter walked away from their lives.
Victor got her an apartment in Lekki and life seemed too good to be true. He was the perfect spouse and when she gave birth to their daughter Parissa at the Premier Hospital, he was there crying and overjoyed. What could go wrong? 
At this point, Victor said he was finally ready to divorce his wife.
Anabelle was not sure what to think, the fact that she was responsible for destroying a marriage weighed heavy on her but no stray emotions was going to get in the way of her happiness. Life couldn't be sweeter.
Then the weird symptoms started, she did investigative tests and found out she was HIV Positive. Victor stayed with her during the tests as they tried to work out the best way to live a full life with it. Strange though was that Victor was tested negative. But her metamorphosed into  full blown AIDS in one year. Her mind could not deal with it, where and when did she contact this deadly disease?
She told Victor. She was sure he would be there for her at this time too He had been there when she was diagnosed with HIV.  Had they not spent the last 5 years together?
At the latest news, Victor stopped all divorce proceedings against his wife and sought reconciliation with her. He soon joined his wife in Canada.
Anabelle was mortified. Who would care for her beautiful daughter Parissa? Her parents had died in a motor accident the year before. Victor did not seem so interested in caring for Parisssa. Her 2yr old daughter would be an orphan.
She then wished she had listened. Listened to the voice that steered her in the honourable path. She chose 'love' over a career, over her parents.
The 'love' had finally killed her.
Parissa is 10 now with no mum and no dad and lives in an orphanage.
Who is to blame in all of this?


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